Saturday, April 17, 2010

What I am and am not looking for

You know, I just want to have a great date with some potential. Sure, I have had a couple of good dates but they usually do something to F**ck it up. I want to meet a man, see that we get along, that we have the same priorities and goals, and that we are happily compatible, fall in love, and live happily ever after or close to happily ever after. Why can I not find that man?

Can you believe a friend of mine actually said, "Carrie, just lower your standards and you'll find someone." Let me be very clear about this, the objective is not to be with someone just to "be with someone". This isn't high school anymore and I don't have time to play games. I have already been through two failed marriages and lost my only child. I don't have the will power to stand by and let someone use me as a door mat just so I can "be with someone". I prefer to be alone if that is the case. And to lower my standards, are my standards and expectations all really that high?

My "standards or expectations"

Loves God
Honesty
Gives and is worthy of respect
Is compassionate and caring
Has a job and is responsible
Treats me good
Won't cheat on me
Volunteers and is involved in helping others
And yes, I would like him to have a healthy sex drive too.

Is all of this really too much to ask? There has to be some physical attraction there too. I don't want to keep a bag over his head the whole time either. And I am sure he would feel the same way about me.

In my perspective, most of these things are traits people need to have to be a decent human being. So I don't think my standards are rally all that high. I am just asking for someone like me who is an upstanding person. I am not saying perfect because the world knows I am not perfect but my morals are pretty high.

As for what I am not looking for? Well, I sure you have read enough bad dates to easily see what I am NOT looking for. I am finding an awful lot of what I am not looking for.

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