A fishy surprise

Museums are a great past time for me which I thoroughly enjoy. I am a self proclaimed "museum junky" I like museums of all kinds. My love for museums is no secret and it is also on my dating profile. There are a million things that could be worse. Well, I was about to find out how a love for museums could back fire.

A date with a person that I have known through another person. I had met them a number of times through our common friend so I was able to trust this person's intent. So when he asked me out on a date, I accepted. He said that he wanted to go on a date that would not be "typical" but something I would enjoy. But, it was a surprise. Okay, I'm game. I enjoy taking new adventures and seeing something interesting.

He picked me up and told me to be prepared that it was a bit of a drive. "You are going to bring me home right?" I jokingly asked but was looking for the correct answer. He looked at me and said, "Yes, of course I am going to bring you home. I'm not going to leave you there." I smiled and said, "Just checking."

Later we stopped for a bite to eat, he was right, it was a long drive. So I knew he must be excited to take me to this place that he was "sure I would like". He was willing to take just about an entire day making plans and driving me all the way. I teased and asked him where he was taking me. Begging for little clues was finally beginning to break him down. The clues he gave me were, "Some place I probably hadn't gone to before", "A unique and interesting place", "A tourist attraction where people come from all over to see" I was beginning to get excited. "Come on, just tell me where it is." I protested with a smile on my face. He told me, "Last clue, I am taking you to a museum." Whoo hoo! I love museums. I was excited and satisfied with the last clue that we were going to a museum. I didn't need anymore clues, that was enough for me. If we were going to a museum, one, I probably have already been there and two, I would like to see a museum that I hadn't been to before. I sat quietly with a smile the rest of the trip. I enjoyed the scenery on the beautiful drive. Having been told that we were going to a museum, I was satisfied and didn't ask anymore questions.

What a surprise! And not a good one either. We got to the museum alright, The Museum and Fishing Hall of Fame. What the hell? A fishing museum?????? Come on. Is this a joke? Are there hidden cameras every where?! I'm on Candid Camera right?! Am I being punked? No? Are you sure? I'm not being set up on a practical joke? This is really the museum he thought I would like? :( I've been tricked! A fishing museum?! I want a new date, can I chose what's behind door number three instead? Awwww...man! Now I have to pretend to enjoy this so he doesn't feel bad.

Oh look, there is a big fish, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another, and another. How have I survived my entire life without having been here to the Fishing Hall of Fame? I guess now I have truly lived. (Not) Haven't I mentioned before that I hate fishing? I thought I did. Mmmmm....

There is even a big fish you can walk into. Well, this is a first! I have never in my whole life ever walked into the anus of a fish. You walk in its anus and you can stand inside of its mouth. Wait, it gets better. To leave, you go in the other direction. That's right! You walk through its mouth, down its throat and out its anus. Yes ladies and gentlemen, a real way to impress a woman on a date is to make her feel as though she has been pooped out by a giant fish! Now I know how my fish sandwich feels. It gives me a whole new perspective on Friday fish fry.

"So, what did you think?" he innocently asked me. I gave him a big smile and said, "No one has ever taken me to a fishing museum before. This is interesting."
I didn't lie. But he was so excited, I just couldn't break his heart. Plus, it was a long walk home.

Men: sometimes it's cute how dumb they are. Just like little puppies. They are so cute but they keep trying to hump your leg. Let's not even begin to discuss the whining they do. That they don't seem to grow out of that.